Yes, doubt me

One thing people have a knack for is doubting their friends it seems. It's kinda sad ain't it? Weren't friends supposed to support you instead of bring you down? In today's society it seems that a "good" friend is the one who treats you like dirt, kicks you in the nuts for laughs, and tears you down whenever they can.

Alot of my "friends" don't think I will be able to finish school or go on a mission. It's alittle discouraging but it motivates me more than anything. It gives me reason to prove them wrong and basically say "SUCK IT!!!" because that is what I will do. Show them I can do what they think I can't. I WILL make it. I have a wristband I wear everyday that reads "future missionary" it does NOT come off until I am in the MTC. This I swear.

I've come too far to fail. I'm only 2 months from recieving my diploma from college. The road hasn't been easy but it's been one hell of a fun ride. I've learned so much. Not just academically but spiritually, socially, and of myself. I've grown alot in this past year and a new door is opening in my life. It will take a turn for the better for once. With the job I will have, I will be able to live by myself if I wanted to.

So go ahead, doubt me, tear me down, spit in my face, stab my back, because What doesn't kill you, makes you stronger and those of you who have doubted me sure as hell haven't killed me. Though you have attempted it, your attempts were pathetic and it has given me determination. I will make it, just watch.

Colbi-Wan Kenobi OUT!

may the force be with you

I hate this feeling >:(

Don't you hate that feeling of anxiety, frustration, and worry? I do. I've been feeling it alot lately in the past couple months. Having a roof over my head has been the current problem. I don't want to go into details because it's a long story that I'd rather not bore you all with. I just hate that feeling where you are constantly worried about something going wrong. When you have been through the things I have, you almost always expect it. I think bad luck spirits follow me since my mother is the epitome of bad karma and she was also born on Friday the 13th. Needless to say, I have the luck of Wyle E. Coyote. If I were to cut a hole in a bridge, everything BUT the hole itself would fall. I really hate living in a place where they feel like I'm not trying to contribute and are always trying to find any excuse to kick me out. ALSO I hate hate HATE not having my views and beliefs respected. It has been a constant boulder in my life since I was 13. Just because I have different views doesn't mean I'm stupid or incompetent. I respect other peoples views so why in Odin's name can they not respect me?

The Rain (poetry)

I do enjoy writing and this is one of my favorite pieces I wrote and thought you would enjoy it

I see the clouds overhead

I can feel it in the wind

tears from the sky, to be shed

the rain is about to begin

I welcome it with a smile

I hope it stays awhile

The cold drops on my face

the rain, my cares erase

The drops fall so calm

I welcom them, with open arms

the splash on the ground

such a peaceful sound

The rain brings me joy

this feeling,nothing can destroy

I stand in the rain for hours

just enjoying nature's shower

standing there with content eyes

watching the tempest pass by

in the rain, I have not a care

I just look at the sky, and stare

My clothes are cold and wet

but I don't want to go inside, not yet

I want to enjoy the rain

savoring it again and again

I hear noone around me

just the drops surrounding me

it rains until the night

such a pleasant, beautiful sight

the rain has now ceased

clothes are saturated, sky is clear

this storm was such a great release

and the rain removed my fear

now calmly, I wait

when the rain comes again

the feeling is so great

when I just stand..in the rain

Guten Nacht!

Well I've officially got a blog now. Since nobody cared about my posts on Facebook or Myspace anymore. Anywho, to those reading, I hope you enjoy reading into my interesting life. I assure you, it's not normal. It's strange, weird, kinda nerdy, and sometimes just stupid. You have been WARNED!!!!